SO many people think I’m crazy. They think I’m over-reacting or exaggerating. They think I’m being extreme or whatever. They think I’m making it up.
Over and over again I am asked why I don’t think I have the opportunity or time to take a shower more than once, twice if I’m lucky, a week.
Granted I could indeed take a shower at night…if I wanted to risk my children waking up, not going to sleep, or getting out of bed to see why I’m in the shower that is sandwiched in-between the paper thin walls of their rooms upstairs. We’re talking about the ability to stand with my head against my bathroom door, hold both my arms out from my body and touch both Alexa’s and Logan’s bedroom doors. Lets just say unless they were dead asleep (which neither one is a heavy sleeper) - night time showers don’t happen.
So, most people ask, why don’t I shower during the day? Surely there’s enough time for them to be playing nicely, zoned out on a movie, cartoon, or educational program, or simply distract them while playing nicely and slip into the shower as long as I make it quick right? Wrong! Every time Logan seems to have a radar that goes off. I used to be able to shut my bathroom door firmly enough that he couldn’t open it so as long as nothing harmful was accessible to him I should get a 5 minute shower no problem. Now he’s able to open the door. UGH -- instead of him coming, standing outside the door and banging on it while full-out bawling and calling for me the entire time I shower, he now enters the bathroom and tries to join me in the shower, still crying, while fully clothed. It just doesn’t happen.
The other reason is that my children, although I love them DEARLY, are devious and sinful. (as we all are) Tonight’s escaped is proof positive of this. I left Logan and Alexa in Alexa’s room nicely playing with toys and barbies. I checked to make sure the bathroom door was firmly shut (so as not to tempt Logan or Alexa with an open invitation) and I went downstairs to try and get a few things picked up & taken care of. Within 5, maybe 10 minutes max I headed upstairs to check on them & get them ready to go out. What I found was nothing short of a catastrophe! They had managed to get into the bathroom, climb on one of Alexa’s playtable chairs, get all the nail polish out of the top drawer of a high cabinet and they had proceeded to open and use several of them. In no time at all they had managed to cover both their bodies in a variety of nail polishes, hair from the bathroom rugs, and the worst of it all, steps from a nail strengthening kit. If anyone has ever seen or used one of these kits they probably are aware of what that means -- rubber cement sort of gel, that is hard and very sticky when it dries.
It was insane! I spent almost 20 minutes trying to get the worst of it off. I used an entire bottle of nail polish remover. Still not much progress. A 20 minute soak in the tub, TONS of soap and shampoo and scrubbing, and they appear to be cleaned. I had to scrape several spots from the strengthening stuff that was left on their skin. It was NOT a pretty sight.
I’m sure many will fault me, after all I let them play alone. I didn’t have the nail polish under lock and key. I didn’t have it (apparently) up high enough.
I typically ride my husband’s case for his method of parenting (watching sports or fox news or his computer for several hours while the kids “play” and destroy every room in our home creating a tornado like effect on the house) whereas I tend to be a mother hen -- playing with the kids most of the day, spending little to no time on the computer minus nap times and play-dates. I do activities with them, draw and color with them, cuddle and read books with them, build houses, play with cars, etc. Rarely do I let them run off and play on their own. This is why!
I wish I had taken pictures of them before I went into panic damage-control cleaning mode. I think the image I have in my mind will live on for months to come. But I would have loved to have proof for one day down the road when I need to remind them of what they put their poor mother through! :) At least perhaps my husband will now understand why I tell him they require CONSTANT supervision! A mother’s (or parent’s) job is never done I guess! :) Its night like tonight I certainly remember (& possibly consider it my mantra): “Lord, grant me the patience to deal with my blessings!”
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